DeadFlowers.US

Send DeadFlowers.US ($l7.95) or

Dead Roses ($19.95  full doz.)

Birthday Gag, Anniversary Fun, or A Joke!

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Send DeadFlowers.US when you have that special person

who is really deserving of some!

Guaranteed to look like CRAP on arrival! 

 

DeadFlowers.US

 

Call us to discuss the details of your delivery

617 - 548 - 6555

ASK FOR DAVE

11am - 7pm EASTERN TIME

10am - 6pm CENTRAL TIME

9am - 5pm MOUNTAIN TIME

8am - 4pm PACIFIC TIME

7 DAYS A WEEK

ALL CREDIT CARDS

&

PAY PAL

 

Typical $39.95 Mixed Dead Flower Bouquet 

 

 TYPICAL MIXED DEAD FLOWER BOUQUET @ $39.95 (above & below-same bouquet)

                          

 

~DEAD ROSES~

Example of 2  FULL DOZ. DEAD ROSES  $37.95

.

1 DOZ. $19.95

"When you don't care enough to send  the very best!"

SAY IT WITH DeadFlowers.US

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We GUARANTEE ...

THE WORST looking bouquet of dead FLOWERS

that money can buy!

We'll make them look like real CRAP!

...and we'll include your message on a beaten up, ratty looking card!

 

 delivery anywhere in the U.S.

****NEXT DAY SERVICE usually AVAILABLE TO CITIES OVER 75,000 POPULATION****

Delivery NOT AVAILABLE on SUNday

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ORDER BY PHONE (only)

And speak to a LIVE person - ME! 

 

617-548-6555 - ASK FOR DAVE

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A FEW GREAT REASONS TO SEND

DeadFlowers.US

•Fantastic to send for an "Over-the-Hill" Birthday gag!

•Reallyfun to send to friends on their Anniversay!

•Great to send to an "Ex"  (for any occassion)!

•Great way to show that you're not pissed off!

•Great for a Valentine's Day gag!

•Great for an April Fool's gag!

•Great for a Halloween prank!

•Great for any fun occasion!

•Great for "getting even"

•Great for anyone who

beats you at

anything!

(i.e. tennis, chess, or your football team, etc)

Be creative - concoct another reason to send DeadFlowers.US

and when you do, let us know!

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 DEAD ROSES

1 Doz. Dead Roses...only$19.95 (makes a point)

2 Doz Dead Roses ...only$37.95 (makes a bigger point!)

3 Doz Dead Roses ...only$55.95 (makes a statemtnt)

4 Doz Dead Roses ...only$72.95 (makes a mess!)

($15 dozen after that)

100 ROSES ...only $139.95(the mother of all dead rose bouquets)

or choose the number of roses as the birthday or other occassion that you're recognizing.

(Choose DEAD RED* or  DEAD BLACK**ROSES. Other colors may be available)

* It may be necessary to substitute colors, but you may request your preference.  Red is usually available.

** for BLACK ROSES (spray painted) add $9.95 per doz.

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MIXED BOUQUETS of DEAD FLOWERS

•Mini - Dead Flowers bunch...$17.95 (for the mini spender)

The DeadFlower bouquet...$29.95 (small token of...whatever!)

Medium Dead Flowers bouquet ...$39.95 (approx.as pictured)

Super Dead Flowers bouquet... $49.95 (they are worth it!)

SuperDuper Dead Flowers bouquet $69.95 (This one piles it on!)

Super DuperPooper Scooper

Mother of all Dead Flowers.US bouquets - $100

(This one really looks like sh*t)

 

Shipping & Handling

2-4 day (average)  $17.95

Next day (exact day) guaranteed delivery

(or your shipping cost refunded)

(to major cities or over  75,000 population) $37.95

(note that next day delivery is not available for Sun. delivery)

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Surcharges near holidays

$10 surcharge on dead flower orders

1 week before Christmas

1 week befor Mother's Day

 

$25 surcharge on ROSE orders

2 weeks before Valententines Day

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Your order of DEADFLOWERs.us

will be JAMMED into a package

with absolutely no care at all and

Guaranteed to look like CRAP on arrival!

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Thank you for letting us say it for you with

DeadFlowers.US

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