Send DeadFlowers ($l7.95) or Dead Roses ($19.95  full doz.)

Birthday Gag, Anniversary, Any GAG -  A JOKE, or get even, or for...???

 ROLLING STONES' SONG, ''DEAD FLOWERS" -   NOT HERE!

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Send DeadFlowers.US when you have that special person who is really deserving!

send a  bouquet of DeadFlowers.US that are guaranteed to look like CRAP on arrival! 

 

DeadFlowers.US

\These look too good!  (not dead flowers YET!)

Call us to discuss the details of your delivery

617 - 548 - 6555

ASK FOR DAVE

11am - 7pm EASTERN TIME

10am - 6pm CENTRAL TIME

9am - 5pm MOUNTAIN TIME

8am - 4pm PACIFIC TIME

7 DAYS A WEEK

ALL CREDIT CARDS

&

PAY PAL

 

 

Typical $39.95 Mixed Dead Flower Bouquet 

 

 TYPICAL MIXED BOUQUET @ $39.95 (above & below-same bouquet)

                          

 

~DEAD ROSES~

Example of 2  FULL DOZ. DEAD ROSES  $37.95

.1 DOZ. $19.95

"When you don't care enough to send anything even close to  the very best!"

SAY IT WITH DeadFlowers.US

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We GUARANTEE ...

THE WORST looking bouquet of dead FLOWERS

that money can buy!

We'll make them look like real CRAP!

...and we'll include your message on a beaten up, ratty looking card!

 

 delivery anywhere in the U.S.

****NEXT DAY SERVICE usually AVAILABLE TO CITIES OVER 75,000 POPULATION****

NEXT DAY NOT AVAILABLE FOR  SUNday OR MONday DeLIVeRY

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  

ORDER BY PHONE (only)

And speak to a LIVE person! 

 

617-548-6555  -  ASK FOR DAVE

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A FEW GREAT REASONS TO SEND

DeadFlowers.US

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•Fantastic for an "Over-the-Hill" Birthday gag!

•Great to send to an "Ex" (for any occassion)!

•Great way to show that you're pissed!

*Great for a Valentine's Day gag!

*Great for an April Fool's gag!

*Great for a Halloween prank!

*Great for any fun occasion!

*Great for "getting even"

*Great for anyone who

beats you at

anything!

(i.e. tennis, chess, or your football team, etc)

Be creative - concoct another reason to send DeadFlowers.US

and when you do, let us know!

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 DEAD ROSES

1 Full Doz. DEAD ROSES...$19.95

2 Doz Dead Roses ...only$37.95 (makes a  point!)

3 Doz Dead Roses ...only$54.95 (makes a  point!)

4 Doz Dead Roses ...only$73.95 (makes a statement!)

($15 dozen after that)

100 ROSES ...only $139.95(the mother of all dead rose bouquets)

or choose the number of roses as the birthday or other occassion that you're recognizing.

(Choose DEAD RED* or  DEAD BLACK**ROSES. Other colors may be available)

* It may be necessary to substitute colors, but you may request  your preference.

** for BLACK ROSES (spray painted) add $9.95 per doz.

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MIXED BOUQUETS of DEAD FLOWERS

•Mini - Dead Flowers bunch...$17.95

The DeadFlower bouquet...$29.95 (small token of...whatever!)

Medium - Dead Flowers bouquet ...$39.95 (approx. as pictured)

Super -  Dead Flowers bouquet... $49.95 (they are worth it!)

SuperDuper Dead Flowers bouquet $69.95 (This one piles it on!)

Super DuperPooper Scooper Dead Flowers bouquet $100 (This one really looks like sh*t)

 

Shipping & Handling

2-4 day (average)  $17.95

Next day (exact day) guaranteed delivery (to major cities or over  75,000 population) $37.95

(note that next day delivery is not available for Sun.or Mon. delivery)

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Pricing & Surcharges near holidays

$10 surcharge on all orders

1 week befor Christmas

2 weeks before Valententines Day

1 week befor Mother's Day

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Your order of DEADFLOWERs.us

will be JAMMED into a package

with absolutely no care at all and

Guaranteed to look like CRAP on arrival!

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Thank you for letting us say it for you with

DeadFlowers.US

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